Ingenuity Unlimited

When the windscreen is smashed, you just smashed it away.
Then you replace it with transparent plastic. But then, you
discovered your budget has gone out of the window because
you forgot to include the windscreen in your insurance. And
so, slowly, the plastic becomes dirty. And so, the cheapest
way is to "open" it, rain, rocks and dirt be dammed. Anyway,
you can't complain about the excellent ventilation it offers.

Wait till you get a fucking traffic summons, you idiot!

Women are always clever

Women are always Clever (got this from a random blog.brilliant!)

Man: " Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."

Man: "I know how to please a woman ."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "I can tell that you want me."
Woman: "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you...to leave."

Man: "May I see you pretty soon?"
Woman: "Why? Don't you think I'm pretty now?"

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there ?"

The T-Rex stripper

OK, OK, I don't know what else to call it as "Wire Stripper" just sounds so bland. I picked this up while we were lost in Penang. Found the wrong shop but boy, it has enough Engineering stuff to make the Engineer inside me drool. After asking for directions to the next shop, I eyed this tool and decided I must have it there and then. All the times I was in Pasar Road, it did not cross my mind to get one. Maybe it explains the empty feeling I always have when I leave the place (apart form my wallet)

Yes, the price was RM35 but she gave me a discount
that even the most kiamsiap Penangnite would faint
from disbelief. Alas, I only had enough to buy one.

I call it the T-Rex because the tool is shaped almost
like its head. Technically, its name would be mutated
T-Rex because under its jaw/neck, was a cutter tool.

How it works is, you insert the wire up to the correct length.
Then grip its legs which would shut the jaws and the inner
teeth would pull and strip the wire. Unfortunately, this is
also a very painful tool if you want to DIY remove your
foreskin down there.....