I think I am a Celebrity. Yes, I really do. I am being famous through no fault of my own. And now, everyone knows me.
Don't believe me?
Here are some questions I asked myself about how to become a Celebrity.
1. Everyone knows about you
Ever since I had the Gout attack last month, wherever I meet someone, they would say, "How's your Leg?" instead of the usual, "Have you eaten", or "How are you?". And if they do not know me, chances are, they will within minutes.........
2. Everyone knows your actions
As soon as I start to limp or walk slowly, they will come up and say, "Whoa, you got it again?"
3. Everybody's free with advise
"Don't eat red meat', "Don't do this", "Don't eat that", etc. Which is true and the bast part of this is, its a great conversation icebreaker too. This way, I get to meet a lot of people instead of them suspecting me. Ha ha ha ha
4. The Paparazzi's love you too
Well, I am not sure about this but just yesterday, while I was limping all the way back to the car, a bunch or workers all stared at me and after I walked past, I definitely did hear two mobile phone shutter clicks. Since my leg was throbbing to badly, I did not have the mood to turn around and verify this and striking a cute post with both 'V' signs.
Anyway, they are just a more exaggerated view of mine as the pain was so bad, I had to distract myself until it was time to see the Doctor. Luckily, Fate helped because most of the traffic lights were green and the traffic jam at Pantai was light. I mean, its very painful to change gears when your left leg felt like it had been stabbed by numerous panji sticks. But the last one was very true.
And so, at the Doctor, he recognised me almost immediately. "That's no leg sprain, its Gout" was the confirmation.
While perusing my medical history card, "Did you have any red meat?"
"No, I replied' (A lie. I had about 4 tablespoons of minced pork last week)
"How about string beans? Tofu?", "Nah" (Another lie. I had them both yesterday and a prawn based soup."
"Did you have any brocoli?"
"Aha......." I replied, sounding to convince him I had tons of it everyday. (Which is also a lie since we did not have brocoli when Avatar started showing here).
And so, he prescribed me some painkillers and if the pain does not subside by Monday, I have to come over (and fast at least 12 hours before) for a Uric Acid test. So, I just hope its OK by Monday because tests takes time and money.
And on the walk back to my car, even a stranger recognised me. "Oh, you have gout too?", "Erm, yeah."
"See that Pharmacy there?", "Just go there and get bio-life, the one with celery and *seomthing* *something*."
"Er"
"Sleep on it for a while and then think about ii, OK?"
"Er, thanks."
But I suspect what brought on more attacks was the special meal we had at Milano's. I guess the uric acid level was still high and what with those cheese and creams increased the level further. And with the last few days of me not carrying a water bottle inside the 35ยบ-odd inferno, really nailed it for me.
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How do I know its gout now? Because the Docsaid so and because I drew a red circle on it
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